While some people express themselves through painting, singing, or playing musical instruments, I have always been deeply connected to the intentional use of language. From the time I was a young girl, I was deliberate in how I crafted sentences and communicated, both verbally and in writing. As a young mom, I have vivid memories of correcting grammar as my children developed vocabularies of their own. I can’t remember a time when I did not dream of becoming a published author. But being a young mother navigating life with children and a career, I was never able to prioritize my writing goal. It wasn’t until my oldest child, Marcus, lost his decade long battle with Substance Use Disorder (SUD) that I put pen to paper, knowing that in an unexpected way and for an unwelcome purpose, my lifelong goal would come to fruition.
Initially my writing was much like a journal. In the earliest hours of the morning, while the rest of the world slept, I closed my eyes and cried out to God. I asked for peace, wisdom, and understanding of all that had taken place. I was searching for an understanding of what had happened and a way to find peace within my absolutely devastated heart, mind, and soul. I worked to make sense of the journey behind me—from Marcus being a carefree a boy to his struggle for sobriety and then the loss of his life. I shut my computer down with the rising of the sun each morning, as I did, I felt a little bit stronger than the day before. In these moments, I distinctly recall feeling hope for the future and a vision of sharing Marcus’ story with the world. Being a teacher by trade, I have a strong belief that information is power and that in sharing his life, even in the Shadows of Grief, he could help others.
I was searching for an understanding of what had happened and a way to find peace within my absolutely devastated heart, mind, and soul.
My journal style writing had nourished my soul and brought me great comfort but was not making the progress that I had hoped for in terms of completing a publishable manuscript. I found myself several months into the project with no clear direction or understanding of how to weave my words together into a meaningful document that would have the impact that I longed for. To that end, I began the process of searching for a writing coach to give me some direction.
After a few coaching consultations I was left feeling cautious and possibly taken advantage of. Call center representatives left me feeling as if I were being baited and as if my signing a contract were more important than the message I needed to share. I returned to my early morning prayer and writing sessions and abandoned my hope of hiring a coach. I was thoroughly surprised one Sunday morning when my pastor announced the newly published book, “Write Your Journey,” which was coincidentally written by our worship leader, Lauren Hunter. As soon as service ended, I worked my way across the room, stepped out of my comfort zone and unashamedly introduced myself. Lauren and I exchanged contact information. In our first conversations I knew that something was different. Lauren wanted to hear my story, I could tell that she cared about me as a person, my son, our journey, and my heart to write our story.
Lauren worked to guide my process over the following four months. She stood by, listened, acknowledged the depth of my pain, and held a safe and genuine space for all that I was processing. As my coach, Lauren guided me from my earliest memories with Marcus to my complete manuscript. Today, she continues to support my journey as a Highly Sensitive Person Coach. I am encouraged and quite literally championed as I learn to navigate the publishing and technical aspects of the writing industry. For those looking to connect with a writing or HSP coach, Lauren can be reached at Laurenhunter.net.
Moving forward, I plan to share Marcus’s story whenever and wherever I can. I intend to honor my son, his life, and his passing through both the written and spoken word. Alongside my writing endeavors, I have a growing desire to comfort others who are grappling with addiction, trauma, and grief. Having been inspired by the impact of a supportive and inspiring coach in my own life, it is my aim to expand my reach and support others as a Life and Grief Coach.
